Improvised & Analyzed

Specialist Crocker’s Case Studies

Keith The Doorman

Keith The Doorman Pic


DIAGNOSIS: Antisocial Personality Disorder

CASE HISTORY: Keith The Doorman will hold the door for you, hold a package for you, and hold you when that trollop Stephanie tells you she’s been seeing her pottery instructor again and while it’s just a casual thing, you’re pretty sure she’s got a regular punch-card and the boneyard.

SUPEREGO: BEHIND THE BONUS: SEASON 3: PART 2



The Helpton Inn

The Helpton Inn Pic


DIAGNOSIS: Borderline Personality Disorder

CASE HISTORY: The Helpton Inn is a national chain of hotels that keeps the savvy business traveler in mind. Free continental dinner, lightning slow wi-fi, beds, and an onslaught of proven methods to make sure you wake up in time for that quarterly sales meeting with Thick Jerry, the Mailroom Slow.

SUPEREGO: BEHIND THE BONUS: SEASON 3: PART 1



Don Pardo


DIAGNOSIS: Histrionic Personality Disorder

CASE HISTORY: A stalwart of voiceover, announcements, and liquid U’s, Don Pardo has been borderline shouting the names of funny people for 412 years.

EPISODES: 3:14



Brown Snow Speeder Squadron


DIAGNOSIS: Avoidant Personality Disorder

CASE HISTORY: With the Empire searching the universe to quash any sign of rebellion, the Brown Snowspeeder Squadron has been deployed to a remote and seemingly insignificant frozen planet called Hoth, but pronounced Hoth. Their defense of this communications outpost is allegedly super important, but there don’t seem to be any consequences when the base is destroyed in the movie. Anyway, The Force ain’t strong with these guys, so bear with them as they try their best to fend off the Imperial onslaught with whatever stuff they’ve got in the glove compartments of their snowspeeders.

SEE ALSO:

Brown X-Wing Squadron
Brown B-Wing Squadron
Brown Resistance Squadron

EPISODES: 3:13



Brown X-Wing Squadron


DIAGNOSIS: Avoidant Personality Disorder

CASE HISTORY: When the Empire descends upon the oppressed citizens of the outer rim, a small team of brave rebels rises up to defend the defenseless. The Brown X-Wing Squadron are not these men. They’re no-thumbs and all-dumbs. These nerf-herders are lucky to pull the tits off a Gundark let alone save the universe from the formidable power of the Dark Side. Also, most of them are Asian so you can imagine their piloting skills. Tip your Bactatenders, I’m outta here.

SEE ALSO:

Brown Snowspeeder Squadron
Brown B-Wing Squadron
Brown Resistance Squadron

EPISODES: 3:11 / 3:17



The Leffingwell Grocers


DIAGNOSIS: Borderline Personality Disorder

CASE HISTORY: Since 1942 BC, your friendly botulism-free food bazaar has been Leffingwell Grocers. Fresh food, reasonable prices, and dick-like customer service are the three reasons people keep coming back to Leffingwell’s. Stop by and try not to lose your damned mind listening to the employees make announcements over the public address system; the one set permanently to a brisk 98db! Thank you for shopping at Leffingwell Grocers!

EPISODES: 3:9 / 3:13

SUPEREGO LIVE: May 3, 2013 • UCB / June 24, 2015 • The Bell House NY

SUPERSHORT: Playlist



The Treasure Island Preschool Parent’s Association


DIAGNOSIS: Borderline Personality Disorder

CASE HISTORY: The Treasure Island Preschool Parent’s Association promotes a secular, free-trade, grass-fed, pre-kindergarten educational containment facility for children under the age of 4 and up. Located in the neighborhood of Silverlake, Los Angeles, admission to Treasure Island is a much sought-after feather in the caps of local parents of all ethnicities, genders, and phylums. A three-year-round school, Treasure Island introduces children to all categories of elementary education from their ABCs to international digital-rights piracy and hyper-local parking lot traffic flow patterns.

EPISODES: 3:4



The White Collar Comedy Tour


DIAGNOSIS: Narcissistic Personality Disorder

CASE HISTORY: They’re back! The finest fiscally conservative comics telling their finest fiscally conservative jokes to the finest fiscally conservative audiences around! Most topics are off limits! It’s a laugh a minute with several minutes of silence to contemplate the slow erosion of our great nation at the hands of socialism and other races.

SUPEREGO: BEHIND THE BONUS: SEASON 2: PART 2



Mixogynists


DIAGNOSIS: Obsessive-Compulsive Personality Disorder

CASE HISTORY: Brick Barrett and Tam Faulkner are New Mexico certified ‘Libation Chemists.’ Their touring tavern show celebrates the finer points of cocktail culture and has entertained and educated tens of people across America. They are tirelessly searching for that golden recipe that will get a woman drunk enough to sleep with either one of them. Or both of them. Or one could just watch. Whatever’s easiest for you.

SUPEREGO: BEHIND THE BONUS: SEASON 2: PART 2



The Kawai River Mercenary Squad


DIAGNOSIS: Borderline Personality Disorder

CASE HISTORY: They’re armed. They’re dangerous. They’re stupid.

SUPEREGO: BEHIND THE BONUS: SEASON 2: PART 1



Linda Staven


DIAGNOSIS: Schizoid Personality Disorder

CASE HISTORY: Ms. Linda Staven has been teaching 5th grade English since 8:30 AM this morning.

SUPEREGO: BEHIND THE BONUS: SEASON 2: PART 1



The Brownriver Township Survivor’s Club


DIAGNOSIS: Antisocial Personality Disorder

CASE HISTORY: The Brownriver Township Survivor’s Club was not as organized as you might think. In fact it was really an ad-hoc organization thrown together in the last days of 2018. You know, after the global cooling spiraled out of control.

SUPEREGO: BEHIND THE BONUS: SEASON 2: PART 1



The Sea Town Splashaholic Spectacular


DIAGNOSIS: Antisocial Personality Disorder

CASE HISTORY: See jet-ski adventure! Killer whale acrobatics! And over three hours of pre-show entertainment(?)!

EPISODES:
2:16



NASA Mission Control


DIAGNOSIS: Paranoid Personality Disorder

CASE HISTORY: In the early days of NASA, decisions weren’t made with analytics and research; decisions were made with balls. Big, brass balls. It was a man’s world. A confusing, analog man’s world with pictures of naked ladies scotch-taped to the mainframes, where supervisors were your drinking buddies, and no one cared if you came into work smelling like a Las Vegas peepbooth. As long as you did your job and got those birds in the sky, no one ever said word one. Some say that these halcyon days of cigarettes and satellites are long gone, but research shows that these space-cowboys are still mounting up and riding high.

EPISODES: 2:15 / 2:17 / 3:3



Campfire With Roy Cabras

With guest speaker Cameron Skench


DIAGNOSIS: Narcissistic Personality Disorder

CASE HISTORY: Roy Cabras is a certified licensed men’s trust circle facilitator. Mr. Cabras is expert in the fields of Yoga, Tai Chi, firewalking, The Art of War, The Triangle Offense, Flugtag, rhythmic gymnastics, and binge drinking. His breakout sessions are kept small: 5-10 men stare into the void and come back stronger, sturdier, and straighter. There are no anger issues he hasn’t seen before, you giant, giant pussy. Each and every Campfire™ meeting brings a new congregation of sad sacks; including corporate middle-managers, milquetoast husbands, and some Koreans.

EPISODES: 2:13 / 2:17 / 3:6 / 3:8 / 3:12



The Golden Dusk Assisted Living Bingo Club

The Golden Dusk Assisted Living Bingo Club Pic


DIAGNOSIS: Old Personality Disorder

CASE HISTORY: Welcome to the Thunderdome.

EPISODES: 2:12 / 3:6

SUPEREGO LIVE: January 25, 2014 • SF Sketchfest



The Hollywood Golden Guild Awards

The Hollywood Golden Guild Awards Pic


DIAGNOSIS: Narcissistic Personality Disorder

CASE HISTORY: The Hollywood Golden Guild Awards is a not-for-profit, profit division of the Hollywood Golden Guild Awards.

EPISODES:
2:12 / 4:5



Starcharters

Starcharters


DIAGNOSIS: Borderline Personality Disorder

CASE HISTORY:
The Starcharters Zoroastrian Zodiac society will tell you your fortune and then tell you the price.

EPISODES:
2:7

SUPEREGO: BEHIND THE BONUS: SEASON 2: PART 2

SUPEREGO: BEHIND THE BONUS: SEASON 4: PART 2



Wells Of America Bank

Wells Of America Pic


DIAGNOSIS: Schizoid Personality Disorder

CASE HISTORY:
CASE HISTORY: Wells of America was founded in 1912 by a real dick. Since it’s first transaction, the institution has been screwing over honest folk regularly.

EPISODES:
2:6

SUPEREGO: BEHIND THE BONUS: SEASON 3: PART 2



Supershort: Access Geology

Access-Geology


SUBJECT: Minerals, Magma, More!

SUPERSHORT: 5



Supershort: Old-Timey Miscellany

Miscellany


SUBJECT: There’s a lady-boob in this one.

SUPERSHORT: 4



Supershort: California Cooking With Claymore Cleveland

California-Cooking-With-Claymore-Cleveland


SUBJECT: Who doesn’t love a yogurt parfait?

SUPERSHORT: 3



Supershort: Gettin’ Laid With Rutherford B. Hayes

Gettin'-Laid-With-Rutherford-B.-Hayes


SUBJECT: Romance advice straight from the top.

SUPERSHORT: 2



Supershort: Old-Timey Assorteds

Old-Timey-Assorteds


SUBJECT: Grab an elixir and get wise.

SUPERSHORT: 1